Faithless
by ariescelestial
Summary: Yuri takes Halley's advice to wait until nightfall, but he wants to go somewhere in the meantime. Margarete follows him to make sure he doesn't get himself in trouble.
1. Prologue

**Disclaimer:**  Don't own Shadow Hearts.  Do own this (hopefully novel, probably not) idea.

**

            "Thank God!"

            There was a low chuckle.  "She was stubborn, wasn't she?"

            "I thought she would never die."  Light brown hair cascaded over the bed as the owner fell onto it.  "But—finally!"

            "I did tell you to be patient, sister."

            "And you, brother, are damningly so."  The woman glared at him with cold hazel eyes.  "Why did you have to wait so long?  Three times, three times she was so weak you could have ended her life there and then—but you didn't."

            "What would be the use of having her for a few hours, and then being destroyed by God?"

            His sister mused over this for a few minutes as he lounged in a nearby chair, eyeing her with amusement.  She **was** impatient, and quick to act without thinking of the consequences.

            "The other five could have still dealt with him," she said, refusing to admit that he was right.

            "Best not to take chances."

            She sat up suddenly, seizing her brother by the collar of his shirt and shaking him.  "Chances?  Who, brother, decided we should take a chance?  We could have ended this **months** ago!  What the hell were you thinking, gambling everything away like that?"

            He smirked at her fiery temper, the same as always.  "Calm yourself."

            She let go of the collar and sat down again on the bed.  "Then explain."

            "The difference between you and me…"  He paused, purposely agitating her further as he drank his glass of water, but before she exploded again he continued.  "The difference is that you gamble when you think you can win; I gamble when I know how to cheat."

            She raised an eyebrow at him, indicating that this was not a sufficient explanation.  "The girl was not a trade for him, she was a bonus.  He'll still be dead when all's said and done."

            "He better off himself soon," she grumbled.

            "Even if he doesn't…"  He grinned devilishly.  "I have a plan."

**

**Author's Note:**  So…there you go.  Take note, this is not related at all to any of my other fanfics at all.  I actually just thought of this idea yesterday, partially thanks to Nights Mistress's 'Hollow' (good fanfic ^^), so let's just say it's highly experimental.

Also, there's a chance that everyone is going to hate this fanfic.  And maybe not just hate, but **hate**.

Yuri:  I think they get the point, Aegis.


	2. Mourning: Yuri

**Disclaimer:**  Don't own Shadow Hearts.

**

**Author's Note:**  Most of the chapter is from Yuri's point of view.  There is one section from another character's (which is marked) and the last section is from a third-person.

And I have no clue how to spell Neameto or Nemeton.  And the quote from the game may or may not be exact.  It's a hit-and-miss thing here.

Also, Yuri's point of view is rather scattered throughout a period of five days.  And he's just a wee bit crazy.

**

            I knew the moment I woke up that she was gone.

            I leaned against her, feeling her still warm skin.  She could have been sleeping if her body hadn't been still, not even moved by breath.

            Alice had known she was going to die.  I had suspected that something was wrong, but…not this…and not so soon…without even doing anything, I had let her go…

            Hot, salty tears rolled down.

            _"Yuri…remember what you said in Nemeton?  'The day you die is the day I die too'?  But, I don't want you to die."_

_            "Alice?"_

_            "If I died…I would want you to live on.  You're a fighter Yuri, you don't just give up because of one loss."_

_            "What are you saying?"_

_            "Promise me…Promise me that you'll keep living, and find happiness.  Please?"_

_            "…Why?"_

_            "Just promise me."_

_            "Alright.  I promise."_

She'd smiled then, and rested her arm against my shoulder as she fell asleep.  She'd often been tired after Neameto, but it didn't seem too bad.  The fights had worn us all out.  Besides, more rest meant she'd feel better sooner, right?  I watched her sleep peacefully, sure she'd be well soon.

            Her head was still resting on my shoulder.

**

            The officials had released me an hour ago.  The body had been examined and they didn't find any cuts, bruises, wounds.  Nothing.  No evidence to indicate that a murder had taken place.  Nothing to prove I was a murderer.

            But I was.  It was my fault she died, and I did nothing to save her.  It had taken me a while, but piecing together what she'd said, what the masks had said…I shouldn't be alive right now.  But Alice had exchanged her life for mine.

            I shouldn't be alive right now.

            Damn fate, luck, chance, damn whatever influence had directed a poor man from Bistritz to ask help from exorcists in Prague.  If they'd never come to Bistritz, they would have never met Keith.  If they'd never met Keith, they would have never found me.  If they'd never found me, Alice wouldn't have died.

            Damn.

**

[Alice's POV]

            I laid still in the darkness for quite some time.  It might have been minutes, it might have been hours, but it seemed like forever to me.

            My soul was held by something…something that bound me tightly.  I couldn't seem to move on, no matter how much I wanted to.

            "Please…let me go," I asked.  "I'm dead.  Yuri…if it's you…you have to let me go."

            "The boy's not that foolish, to keep a soul from moving on."

            I gasped and looked around as I heard a familiar cackle.  Sword mask was in front of me and I glared at him.

            "Let me move on.  I'm already dead, there's nothing more you can do to me."

            "Oh, really?"

            I felt a chill go down my spine, but I stood my ground.  "Let me go!"

            "If all goes well, you'll pass on soon enough.  And if all doesn't…"

            "Then what?"

            His only reply was a long cackle as he disappeared into the darkness, leaving my imagination to invent the possibilities.

**

            Despite how many people I'd seen die, this was the first wake that I'd been to.  Go figure.  People were lining up to see Alice, already in a coffin.  I hadn't gone to see her.

            Mrs. Elliot had asked me earlier if I would speak about Alice at the funeral.  Give an eulogy or whatever.  I had said no.

            It was probably cold-hearted to her.  It was hard saying no to a kind lady who had just lost her daughter and, not too long ago, been made a widow.  But I had no clue what I should say, what I **could** say.  I couldn't do it.

            Someone came up to me; though there wasn't much conversation, some people expressed their regret.  "I'm so sorry about Alice.  You're Yuri, correct?  Her fiancé?"

            "We weren't engaged," I corrected.  "You are?"  I'd seen the family members earlier, and she wasn't one of them.

            "My name is Rebecca.  Rebecca Clark.  I didn't know Alice that well, but—"

            I nodded.  A lot of people here were only passing acquaintances, some hadn't even known her at all, but still came—to pay respect, I guess, or comfort her mother, who had completely broken down at this point with emotion.

            I simply felt numb, like we were discussing a stranger's passing.

            "So how are you doing?"  Rebecca seemed to be scrutinizing me with her hazel eyes.  "It must be hard."

            "Yes."

            "Do you ever feel like giving up?"

            I knew immediately what she'd meant by 'giving up'.  How often these past few days had I thought about suicide?

            "Sometimes, but I won't.  I can't.  I made her a promise."

            Her eyes narrowed and her hand moved up towards her jacket.  "A promise?  Well, then—"  Her hand moved inside and I saw a flash of metal.

            "Sister."  A man grabbed her elbow.  He had short light brown hair, the same as his sister, but dark blue eyes.  "It's time to go now."  He looked at me with an apologetic expression.  "We must be off now."  He all but dragged his sibling back to the door.

            I found myself grinning.  Death was stalking me.

**

            "I really can't take my eyes off you," Edward said, sounding amused.  "When did you get **that** little toy hidden away?"

            "It's not a toy, it's a knife," she spat.  "And why did you stop me?"

            "Because you would have gotten yourself killed."

            Rebecca scowled and yanked her arm away.  "He was totally off guard.  If you'd let me, they'd be planning for a double funeral right now."

            "I doubt they'd be willing to give you one."

            The younger sibling grumbled at her brother's rejoinder, looking around the street.  Suddenly her eyes fell upon a young nobleman who looked like he was going to the wake.  Behind him was a teenaged boy, and at the end of the strange group was an old Chinese man and a young woman.  The woman seemed to notice Rebecca's stare, because she looked back at the girl.  "Brother, look.  Are those—"

            "His companions.  And it's not polite to stare."

            She averted her gaze to the ground, waiting until the last of them was inside.  "They're coming to pay their respects?"

            "Probably.  Now, I suppose since you tried to kill him that he is nowhere close to committing suicide?"

            "He said he couldn't."

            Her brother looked at her curiously.  "Why?"

            "Seems like he made a promise to his precious girlfriend."

            Edward grinned.  "Promises were made to be broken.  There's still a way…and I think you'll enjoy it."

**

**Author's Note:  **You know how during the first chapter I never referred to the brother or sister by name?  You probably thought that was for suspense or mystery or whatever.  The truth is I hadn't come up with names for them yet.  ::sweatdrop::

Anyway, their names actually come from classmates at grade school.  Edward was a small crush (although I **just** realized as I'm typing this that both Edwards have same-color eyes, which I swear was not intended), and Rebecca was a classmate.  Do the names work?  I'm not sure.  And why do my evil girls have names that start with R?

And is it just me, or has my writing gone downhill recently?

**

**Reviewers:**

**Araschid:**  I know, I've got to finish them all or you guys will want to kill me.  And if I don't finish Shadow Souls, Yuri will definitely kill me (he's been complaining that I've put him through too much torture to stop now…)

**Greyfriars:**  Uh…I was pleasantly surprised when I found how many reviews people gave my story.  I began wondering if my stories were really that good or if Shadow Hearts does something to a person's brain.  Probably the latter, seeing the effect it's had on me…

I've never read The Secret History, so I don't know.  Actually in the first chapter, only the sister was described, so maybe the brother does look like him.  Or maybe not.

And right now you love it, but later on…well, it depends on how accepting you are.

**Gutterfiend:**  I don't know how I can write all this stories at once.  I'm just trying to.  ::grins::

Actually, very good.  Rebecca and Edward are related to the masks, although they aren't masks themselves.

**Kimgrasshopper:**  Hmm?  You had a feeling about who the siblings were?  They're both original characters, so…or do you mean about the role they play in the fic?

**Nights Mistress:**  Actually, the foundation of it might be a little similar to yours (like right now they're going to be staying at Bacon's house…is it okay?  I feel like I'm stealing).  And you gave me a definite idea in your fanfic, which people may or may not hate.

It was also the challenge I set in my review to your fanfic, about having a fic where Alice died and Yuri lived (because Margarete in your fic does point out that if he dies, what was the whole point?)  Right after I sent the review, I got to thinking and this is the result.

**Noodles:**  Thanks for the review.


	3. Nightmares

**Disclaimer: **No own Shadow Hearts.

**

[Alice]

            "Ohoho.  So sorry dear."

            I stiffened at the voice.  Grail mask.

            "It's not going to plan." 

            "That will bring you grief."

            "Kya ha ha…your sacrifice was a foolish one."

            I stared at Sword mask.  "Foolish?  I don't think it was foolish to save Yuri!  I love him."

            "Enough of this," a fifth voice said, so icy.  I knew immediately and turned to face my executioner.

            "Atman."

            He nodded, an odd sight.  "How beautiful, how exquisite your soul was to taste.  A drop of pain—delicious."

            _Calm down.  He's trying to intimidate you._  Still, I couldn't help but feel nervous.  "What are you trying to do?  I fulfilled your soul contract."

            The masks began to laugh again.

            "Fulfilled? Oho-"

            "Not quite, not quite-"

            "What do you mean?  The deal was my life for his!" I yelled.

            Sword mask laughed again.  "Your life?  Why would we want your life?"

            Wait.  The trade wasn't my life?  Then why had I died?  Had it been for nothing?

            No.  I tried to remember the deal I had agreed to.

            _"In return for opening the Gate…"_

What had I agreed to?

            _"…we will one day come for your soul."_

            "My soul!"  I gasped.

            "Now you see we have power over you, even in death," Gold mask told me.

            Staff laughed.  "Had you never met that detestable Harmonixer, you would have surely gone to heaven…"

            "…but as it is, you will be damned to a fate worse than hell."

            My voice was shaking as I asked, "A fate…worse than hell?"

            "Alice Elliot, you are sentenced to…"

            I turned to Atman and froze as I saw the judgment in his eyes, his seven blood red eyes.  "Please…no…" I whispered.

            "Oblivion."

**

[Margarete]

            Alice was beautiful, even in death.  There was simply an innocent quality that had always marked her as different from everyone else.  Her hands were clasped together on her stomach.  Her face was relaxed as if she'd simply gone to sleep and never woken up.

            Wait.  That **was** how she'd died.

            She'd been such a good friend.  The kind of person you felt you could tell your problems to, and she would listen without judging, without interrupting, she'd just listen.

            And now she was dead.  Well, at least she was in heaven, probably seeing her father.  I tore my eyes away from her, facing the others.  There was something else we had to do.  "Alright, let's go talk to the kiddo."

**

            It took us a while to find Yuri.  He was standing alone in a corner near the back, dressed in unusually formal clothing.  That might have been the reason we passed by him the first time, but I think it was also that we didn't hear him.

            Boasting, laughing, talking, cursing—he wasn't too loud, but he was an attention-getter.  Just in his nature, I supposed.  But now he was silent, lost in his own little world.

            "Yuri," Halley called.

            He looked up and saw us.  "Hi."

            He sounded so distant.  Well, it was certainly understandable.  "Hey, how are you holding up?"

            The kid smiled, a curious half-smile.  "Not too well."

            Keith looked as confused as I felt.  If he wasn't doing well, why was he smiling?  "It's been hard, hasn't it?"

            "I almost got stabbed."

            "What!"

            Some people were glaring at Halley, and he realized he'd been way too loud.

            "When was this?" I demanded.

            "Just now.  Girl was about to pull a knife on me.  Her brother stopped her."

            I stared at him.  He was smiling again.  He was practically laughing about almost dying!  "Kiddo, no offense, but what is wrong with you?  That's not funny."

            He shrugged.  "What do you want?"  Now his tone was direct, almost rude.  I scowled and was about to make a retort—something about him actually making sense—when Zhuzhen interrupted.

            "We were still at Roger Bacon's when we heard about Alice's death."  Yuri and Alice had left ahead of schedule, eager to meet with Alice's mother.  I remembered she hadn't been sure how soon she'd die, and was afraid it'd be too soon—her fears had been justified.  "and you probably don't have a place to stay…maybe you should stay with us, at least until you figure out what you're going to do."

            Yuri looked down, considering.  "Sure.  Hold on a minute."  He walked past Keith, heading upstairs.

            "What is wrong with him?"  I looked at Zhuzhen.  "He thought it was funny."

            "Calm down, Margarete," Zhuzhen said.

            "But I'm worried, because—"

            If the brother hadn't stopped her, would Yuri have?  And why—why would someone want to kill him now?

            "He's coming with us.  I don't think we should worry," Keith said.

            My grumbling was interrupted by Yuri's return.  "I told Mrs. Elliot.  She wants me to be here for the funeral tomorrow."

            "That's fine," Zhuzhen said.

            "Better pack," said Halley, "Where's your stuff?"

**

            Yuri's inn room was surprisingly neat.  The top of the bed was rumpled, but that was all.  Had he even slept here?  Two suitcases sat next to each other: Yuri's, old and battered, and Alice's, a bit worn but well-cared for.

            Yuri noticed us looking and said, "I was gonna give it to Mrs. Elliot.  Could you run that to her, Halley?"

            Halley nodded and picked up the suitcase.  "You've been holding onto it?" Keith said.

            Yuri shrugged.  "It's hers."

            That was like him.  We all knew how much he valued his cross and talisman, reminders of his parents.

            He picked up his suitcase and opened it.  He took out his money and started counting out what he owed the inn.  Right then I noticed something.  "Is that all the money you have?  That's nowhere near what you had before."

            "Was it stolen?" Zhuzhen asked.

            "No."  He was still counting, starting again to double-check.  "I gave some to Mrs. Elliot.  You know, she's a widow, and she's probably been having a hard time with money.  And…I guess I felt like I have responsibility for her.  If everything had gone well, I might have been her son-in-law," he said, more quiet now.  His eyes moved to the suitcase and I followed; there was a small black case inside.  It was just the right size for a ring.

            _Oh, Alice…_

He replaced the remaining money and snapped the suitcase shut.

**

[Alice]

            Hurt.  It hurt so badly.  All over, aching as I leaned against the tree.  How could they have hurt me?  I was only spirit…and yet, the pain was real, raw.  My tears blurred the sunset.  There was a wound but I couldn't find it, and that scared me even more.  Was this what Atman had meant by oblivion?

            No!  It would be fine, as long as I stayed by the tree…as long as I stayed in this memory.

            _Memory…?  How did I get here?_

            The gates opened with a loud creak.  Already, the masks had found me.  I felt a sense of dread, so strong I knelt down by the tree, shaking with fear.  Now they were going to destroy me.  I could already feel the pain; a thousand knives being driven into me.

            A hand touched my shoulder and I flinched.  But…masks didn't have hands.  Looking up, I saw Yuri.  The one I had sacrificed myself for.

            I stood and grabbed onto him.  He was my only anchor, the only one who cared for me here.  His arms slowly wrapped around me, warm and secure.

            "Alice?  What's wrong?"  I didn't answer.  Should I tell him?  But then I'd have to tell him everything, and he would feel guilty…but it hurt so badly…  "Why are you crying?"

            "Scared," I blurted out.  _No, don't tell him, there's nothing he can do about it anyway…_

            "Why?"  He sounded a bit afraid as well.  No, it wasn't fear, but worry.  I couldn't tell him.

            "I'm so scared."  I buried my face in his trench coat, _please don't ask me anymore._

            "Are you hurt?"  How could I answer that?  I felt pain, but wasn't sure what hurt, only knew it couldn't happen again.  Couldn't be hurt again.  "Alice…please…tell me what's wrong," he insisted.

            "I can't," I whispered.

            **Very well.**

            Yuri looked confused, scanning the Graveyard for any threats.  Something tugged at me and I gasped, hearing him call my name even as I registered the black surrounding me.  I was back with the masks.  Had I even been gone?

            Atman smirked.  "You did so little with such an opportunity…"

            I couldn't speak.  There were screams, still echoing here, my screams.  Why had I screamed?  Why didn't I know?

            "You could have ended your pain then and there," he continued.  "I will tell you a way you can escape this…"

**

            "I will tell you a way you can escape this," Edward said.  Rebecca watched as he sat rigid in the chair, his blue eyes seeming to become deeper, darker.  "This does not have to be done by the contract."

            Was the girl weakening?  It seemed she had certainly been frightened, but she was also stronger, much stronger than the others Atman had destroyed.  And Atman was also weakened now from his…its imprisonment.  Rebecca tended to equate her brother with Atman, as he was the one usually in control.  He had a lazy smile right now; he was pleased.  That must mean it was going well.

            "I will release you," he continued, "And you will go on your way to heaven."  The girl was probably hanging on his every word now.  Who wouldn't want to go to heaven?  "…On one condition."

**

**Author's Note:**  Okay, it's one day late.  I'm sorry.  I was having an awfully hard time writing Yuri and Margarete.  I've never done people in grief before.  ::kicks dirt:: so it sucks.

            Hopefully it will get better, but I keep thinking that my writing's going downhill.  Might just be the fact that I have four stories and two more that keep pestering my brain, asking to be written.  Must…limit…self…  Aah!  And of course the real thing that's pestering me is that I'm in transitions for two fanfics.  'Shadow Souls' (they're going to a new world) and 'I Love You, Daddy' (which is **supposed** to be turning darker but is not cooperating).  …Maybe I should get a beta reader, but the problem is I have no one to ask.

            And again, I'm not doing reviews this time because of fanfiction.net.  But thank you to everyone who sent one.


	4. Meanings

[Margarete]

            I tugged at the itchy dress I was wearing.  I thought about taking it off, but quickly rejected the idea.  It was the only black dress I had with me, and it wouldn't be right to wear something else today.

            I went downstairs, then stopped, seeing Zhuzhen, Keith, Halley and Roger Bacon seated at the table.  Halley and Keith were dressed in black suits while Zhuzhen was in his regular clothing.  Roger Bacon was dressed normally as well, but then, he hadn't gone to the funeral.

            "Where's Yuri?" I asked.  My voice seemed too loud to me in the quiet room.

            Roger Bacon shrugged.  "He hasn't come back yet."

            "He's still out?"  Our coats were next to the door; I grabbed mine and tugged it on.  "I'm going to go get him."

            "He said he wanted to be left alone," Zhuzhen reminded me.

            "We've left him alone for three hours.  The sun's setting and if **someone** doesn't get him, he'll stay out there the whole night and give himself a cold.  Or pneumonia.  It'd be just like him," I grumbled to myself.

            "I'll come with," Halley volunteered, getting his coat as well.

            Yuri had disappeared almost immediately after we'd gotten back from the funeral.  Roger Bacon had assured us that the ruins had been sealed again, so he couldn't have gotten in there—which was the reason we had tried to keep him with us at first.

            He was sitting on the cliff near James's grave.  Both Halley and I were startled at first, but he was just sitting, not doing anything.  I gave a small sigh.

            "Kiddo, you hungry?" I called.  I heard a reply but couldn't tell if it was a yes or no.  Since he didn't move or even look at us, I was guessing it was a negative.  I walked closer to him and said, "It's getting pretty cold out here.  You should come in soon."

            "I'm fine."

            I examined him.  He was wearing the black suit still, which looked odd on him.  His hair, though neat this morning, was back to its usual mess.  I shook my head and followed his gaze to the sunset.  "It's almost nighttime, come on."

            This time he didn't even bother to reply.

            I gritted my teeth, ready to scold him, when Halley said, "You're being a hypocrite."  _What is he talking about?_

            Yuri's expression was stony.  "I don't care, Halley."

            "Remember what you told me in London?"

            Yuri's hands were only white-knuckled fists in his lap.  "And how is it the same?  You got your mom back.  Are you saying Alice's going to come back?"

            Halley's blue eyes widened and he seemed lost for an answer.  Taking a chance, I sat down next to Yuri and looked so I could see his face better.  "He's only trying to help."

            "Yeah, well…"

            He sounded so bitter.  Trying to think of some way to improve his mood, I eventually asked, "Do you want to talk about it?"  Realizing that might make him even madder, I added, "You don't have to, but…if it would help…"

            "Actually, I do."

            That was reassuring.  Until…Until he asked…

            "You knew she was going to die, didn't you?  Why didn't you tell me, Margarete?"

**

[Yuri]

            She didn't show much surprise, but then again, she's Ms. Spy Genius.  Probably doesn't show much surprise about anything.

            "Yes…I did know," she admitted finally.  "But I only found out that day, in the float.  I had no idea before…"

            "You knew?" Halley asked, sounding surprised.  I ignored him and repeated my other question.

            "Why didn't you tell me?"

            "Alice asked me not to tell you.  She didn't want you to know."

            "That's it?" I demanded.  "She told you, and you didn't think twice?  If I had known what was going on, I could've…maybe I could've…"  I stopped, not even sure of what I was saying.  Wouldn't Alice have told me if she thought there was something I could do?  Instead she had just said nothing and…

            "Halley?"

            "Yeah?"

            "Why don't you go back," Margarete said.  "Tell everyone we'll be coming soon."

            I didn't feel like going back.  I just wanted to be alone for a while…maybe a long time…

            Margarete put her knees up to her chest and rested her head on them, watching the sunset.  "I would've told you if she hadn't asked me.  I should've told you anyway.  I saw the ring."

            "You did?"  My voice sounded strange to me.  I hadn't meant for anyone to find it.

            "When you were packing your things.  You were…going to propose, weren't you?"

            I kicked out my legs, dirtying the suit even more.  Why was she asking about it?  It annoyed me, but it wasn't like she was trying to be nosy.  "Yeah.  I wanted to in London."

            "After I saw it…I knew I should've told you anyways.  If I had, you might've been able to save her.  And even if you couldn't, you probably would've proposed to her sooner."

            "I would've," I agreed.  She flinched at that.  Did she feel guilty?  Well, she should.

            Margarete chewed her lip.  "Alice would've been really happy, I bet."

            "I bet."  I took out the small black box and tossed it up and down.  "I think so…"  _Or I hoped._

"Well, you have something to remember her by," Margarete said.

            I caught the box again and stopped, tightening my grip on it.  _Something to remember her by?_

            "Yuri?"

            I stood up and glared at Margarete, holding the ring out.  "I can't remember her by this.  This has nothing to do with her.  She never saw it, she never touched it."  My voice was starting to shake again, and soon I realized my whole body was trembling.

            "But still…"  She looked surprised by my outburst.  "Doesn't—"

            "The only thing this reminds me of is my ignorance, and my failure.  So for all I care, it's worthless!" I yelled, and with all my strength, I threw the black box.  It was lost for a few seconds in the glow of the sunset before I saw it fall into the ocean.

            Margarete put a hand on my shoulder, making me look back at her.  "Feel any better?" she asked in a soft voice.

            I thought about it.  "Yeah.  A little."

            "Let's go back then."

**

            I tossed around in a mess of blankets.  I was tired, but I couldn't go to sleep.  I kept thinking about earlier in the day, of seeing Alice's coffin lowered into the ground and the little white grave…

            No, no.  Just go to sleep.

            But it was hard to forget, watching two funerals at once.  Two brown coffins being lowered into the ground, one at a gray stone, another at white…I rolled over, grabbing the pillow.  I could still see the masks' smirks.

            I rolled again, stopping when I was on my back.  I made myself relax, slowly trying to calm down, and maybe go to sleep sometime before dawn…and then…

            Gates slammed shut behind me.  My eyes opened to see the Graveyard.  Even from the entrance, I could see the small gravestone that had been made for Alice.  Those damn masks had been mocking her throughout the entire funeral; now they were going to pay.  I stomped towards the large temple, intent on letting them feel some pain.

            But as I approached, I became distracted; there was the sound of someone crying.  It sounded like a girl…it couldn't be…?

            I back-tracked a little and then looked around.  The noise was coming from the gates, just like they had been last night.  It had to be Alice…

            She was curled in a ball, rocking back and forth.  It made me kind of nervous; I'd never seen her this upset.

            "Alice, what's wrong?"

            She looked up at me.  Her eyes were all red and shiny.  She rubbed the tears away before she answered, "I'm just upset."

            "About what?"  I pounced on the first possibility and asked, "Have the masks done anything to you?"

            "I…"  Alice shook her head and told me, "I don't know."

            "What do you mean, you don't know?"

            "How long has it been s-since I died?

            I sat down next to her to look at the frozen sunset.  It was different from the one I'd seen earlier, this one was much more gentle.  "Your funeral was today."

            "Oh…"  She wrapped her arms around her legs, actually seeming calmer.  "Is my mother alright?"

            "She's fine.  You know, I think she liked Halley a lot," I said, thinking back to when they'd met.

            "Halley?"

            "Yeah.  It's funny that they've never met before, isn't it?  London's a big—"

            "Who's Halley?"

            I stopped in the middle of my sentence and stared at her.  "Halley.  You know, he's the one who uses ESP…you're kidding right?"

            "Halley…?"  Her eyes were wide and unfocused.  I quickly realized she wasn't joking at all. She grabbed my hand and held onto it.  "Who is he?  Do I know him?"

            "Of course you know him!  We met him in London remember?  After Margarete got our money stolen?"

            She seemed confused now.  "Yes…I remember that, but…"  Her grip on my hand tightened.  Alice was starting to dig her nails into it now, and I winced.

            "Alice, calm down.  We found their hideout.  You remember that, don't you?  And that's where we found Halley—"

            "No.  I don't remember," she said.  Her nails now dug in so hard that they pierced the skin and I winced.  Then she let go and shoved my hand away, like she was pushing me away.  "Just go, please…leave me alone…"

            "Alice?"

            "Go away!"

            I was so startled by this I simply followed her instruction and went outside the gates, then left the Graveyard.

**

            _Just a dream.  Just like last night.  It was only a dream._

I repeated this to myself before opening my eyes and staring at a spot on the ceiling.  _It didn't mean anything, she's fine…how can a dead person forget things?  It was just a dream…_

            That was before I sat up and saw the blood on my hand.

**

**Author's Note:**  Those who remember might be thinking 'where's the funeral scene?', as I have been complaining that I don't know how to write for funerals.  So it was cut out, since it wasn't that important in the first place and was giving me way too much of a headache.  Maybe if I ever do a rewrite…

**

**Reviewers:**

**Elf Fanatic Lark:**  Thanks for the review.

**Araschid:**  The problem was ff.net counted the last chapter without actually uploading, so it was uploaded again and counted twice.  Yuri gets his mother's cross during a sidequest.

**Greyfriars:**  You have work?  I'm too lazy for work.  :p

**Nights Mistress:**  Um…because I didn't want two brothers or two sisters?  ^^;  It does play some importance later, but not that way.

I seem to be hunted by an 'aw' monster.  -.-  Dang.

**

I have a feeling there might have been more reviews that ff.net swallowed up, so sorry if you reviewed and I haven't acknowledged it.  Oh yeah…it's been a while since I wrote for this, so if I'm off or making anyone OOC…feel free to complain.


	5. More than a dream

            I stared at the thin red line on my hand.  It was in the same spot Alice had grabbed me and dug her nails in.  I looked around Roger Bacon's house, then stared at my hand, wondering when the dry blood would disappear.  I turned over and shook Halley awake, sticking my hand in front of his face.  "Halley, do you see this?"

            "Yeah.  The blood?  Cut yourself on something?"

            Halley saw it too.  I wasn't hallucinating then, and it hadn't been a dream.  It was real.  "No, Alice did."

            Halley blinked a few times.  He was still groggy.  I could see his face as my news sunk in.  At first he looked confused, and then he had a look of pity.  "Yuri, Alice is dead."

            "I know that!" I said hotly.  The anger rushed up quickly.  Like I could even forget that.  And what was with him?  "She was in the Graveyard."

            "Why?"

            "I don't know.  She was just crying.  She kept saying she hurt a lot," I told him.  "I think the Masks are doing something."

            Yet he still had that same expression, disbelief mixed with pity.  If he didn't wipe it off real soon, I'd wipe it off for him.  In a patient tone, he asked, "Are you sure you weren't dreaming?"

            I exploded.  I hadn't been in a good mood to start with and his doubt was pissing me off.  "No, I saw her twice!  And get that look off your face you—"

            His expression did change quickly and he held up his hands.  "Alright, alright.  Calm down."  I sat back but continued to glare at him.  Who was he to talk about being calm when he made buildings shake every time he got mad?  "I thought it might be a dream because, well—it seems like something you'd dream about.  And both times were after you fell asleep, right?"

            I forced my fists to unclench as I answered, "Yeah, but it wasn't a dream."

            "Fine.  But I think you should make sure.  I'm not trying to make you angry," he said, shaking his head, "I just think you need to be sure before you jump to conclusions."

            With a deep breath, I tried to calm down.  There was a small chance he was right.  Before meeting Alice, I'd had repeating dreams of being chased by Death Emperor in the Graveyard.  Maybe, just maybe it was the same thing as now.  But I doubted it, looking down at the scratch on my hand.

            "Why don't you try going to the Graveyard right now?  See if Alice is there.  If she is there, we'll know it can't be a dream, and then we'll try to figure out what to do."

            "Right," I grumbled.  It made sense.  I laid down, blocking out the sunlight with my blanket, and focused on the Graveyard.  It was hard since I knew Halley was watching me, but within a few minutes I was asleep.

            The Graveyard was the same as ever, the air just as foul and thick as ever.  I walked over to the gates and flung them open, searching inside.

            "Alice?" I called.  I strode to the tree and looked around wildly.  "Alice!"

            No one answered.  I looked at the stilled sun and the tree.  There was no Alice.  No Alice, crying that it hurt for some reason she wouldn't tell me.  There was no one but me.

            I sank down on the grass, laughing.  Relief flooded me.  Alice wasn't here, she was at peace, in heaven.  Halley had been right.  It had just been a bad dream.  My laughter almost choked me as I tried to steady myself.  It was too much.  All that anxiety had been for nothing.  Slowly, slowly I could breathe again, the laughter dying down.

            Back outside the gates, I was about to go back when I remembered that I'd forgotten to thrash the Masks in my dream.  And since this wasn't a dream, I could give them a real beating for their mockery.  I grinned as I hadn't in the past few days, finally relieved.

            The Masks were missing from their usual posts though.  I looked at the bare steps, unguarded.  Where had they gone?  Had they gone with Alice had died?  Something didn't seem right about that.

            Were they inside the door?  It was closed, since there was no more malice.  Still, I walked up the door.  There was boisterous laughter from inside; I could tell Grail's laughter from Sword's, after having heard them for so long.  Underneath there was a fainter sound, the sound of someone weeping.  My stomach lurched when I realized it was a girl.  Alice.  The Masks were hurting her.

            I pushed on the door but it didn't move.  I rammed my body into it, halting both the laughter and the tears.

            "Y-Yuri," a faint voice said, weak from crying.  That was Alice's voice.  Oh God, why was she in this hellhole?

            "Alice!  Can you hear me?" I yelled.  I was straining against the door, trying to make it move.  It wouldn't.  Why couldn't I open it?  "Goddamn it, open!"

            "Kehehe…  Only those with Malice can get in this door, boy," the Sword mask told me.  "You'll just have to wait until we're done with her."

            "I'm gonna rip you apart when I get in there!" I roared.  Taking a step back I fused into Lobos and summoned a large chunk of rock, hurling it at the door.  It held.

            "Kehehe…"  The other masks' laughter joined Sword's at my attempts to open the door.  I couldn't get in.  "Alice, can you hold on?" I yelled after disembodying.

            "Yes."

            "I'll be back soon, I promise!"

            I jerked awake, startling Halley.  "Why did you fuse?" he asked.

            I paid no attention to him as I ransacked the room.  Where were my roots?  My claws were buried underneath some clothing, and I didn't bother looking for my accessories.

            "What are you doing?"

            "I'm going to the ruins.  I need some malice," I said shortly.  If malice was the only way I could get in, I'd get plenty of it in the ruins.

            "Hey, hold on!"

            "I'm not waiting!" I yelled at him.  Tossing on my boots, I stormed up the circular stairs and out of Roger Bacon's house, hearing Halley telling Zhuzhen to wake up.  I shook my head, knowing they wouldn't catch up.  The adept was too slow.

            To my relief, Roger Bacon hadn't had enough time to seal the monastery's ruins back up.  I ran down the stairs and into the labyrinth, never thinking twice.  All I had to do was get some malice and then beat the tar out of those masks for what they were doing to Alice.  I began to fuse into the Seraphic Radience, knowing it'd be the fastest, when I heard Halley yell, "C'mon Yuri, slow down!"

            He was winded and there was no sign of Zhuzhen.  "She's in there, and I'm going to get her out of there as quick as I can," I told him.  "I can't get to where she is without getting some malice."

            Halley nodded as Zhuzhen appeared at the top of the stairs.  "Alright.  Just let us help you, okay?"

            "I would if you weren't going to slow me down!"  This time I fused and fled into the labyrinth, relying on the Seraphic Radiance's instincts to find some monsters.

            I quickly located some Guinea Pigs—gone.  Inverses, gone.  I went into every battle full of rage and with one thought in mind: get malice.  The fallen god made it incredibly easy.

            At some point I noticed Halley's slingshot attacks, sometimes killing one or two monsters in a group before I could get it.  And Zhuzhen helped out with his fire attacks.  Caught up in the fighting, I told myself I'd thank them later, after Alice was safe from those idiotic Masks.

            The time blurred past as we demolished the monsters.  I noticed Zhuzhen slowing down and then realized I was getting tired myself.  After another group of demons, I disembodied.  "Just a rest," I said, more to myself than to the others.  "I need to check how much Malice I have."

            I slipped the talisman off from around my neck and held it in front of my face.  How much did it say?  How much more did I need until it was glowing red, when the doors would be open?

            The talisman was blue.

            That was impossible.  After about ten or twelve monsters, it usually turned green—we had killed more than that.  Why was it blue?

            I drew in a deep, shuddering breath as I remembered that in the past few months, I'd only been able to gather malice when Alice was nearby.  I thought that it would change now that she was dead, but it was the same.  Without Alice, I couldn't gather any more malice.  I couldn't get in the door.

            I yelled, the words already strangled in my throat and incoherent by the time they were out.  I raised the talisman in my fist and smashed it against the rock, smashed it until the tiny glass part was broken and my hand was raw and bleeding.  Then I rested my head against the hard stone and cried.

**

**Author's Note:  **Oh boy…this one was really a rush job, so sorry if you don't like it!

**

**Reviewers:**

**Elf Fanatic Lark:**  Probably Alice's sanity meter will run out first.

**Araschid:**  I wonder how much SP Alice has at level 99.  Probably 18 or something.

**Greyfriars:**  Thank you!  ^^


	6. Break for Brunch!

[Margarete]

            Keith and I were eating a brunch as I wondered just where on earth the others were.  I had seen Yuri leaving as I woke up to Halley's yells, and the kid and Zhuzhen had left shortly after.  Keith knew nothing since he'd managed to sleep through all of the shouting.  Still, as long as those two were with Yuri, he'd be fine.  I scraped some scrambled eggs on my toast, eating both.

            The door to Roger Bacon's house whooshed open.  My back was to the entrance.  Keith looked up curiously and then frowned.  "What happened?"

            Turning around, I saw Halley and Zhuzhen at the top of the stairs.  They were bruised and cut, but not very badly.  As they walked down, Yuri trailed after them.  He moved as if half asleep, his eyes glued to the steps.  Something had obviously gone wrong.  "Yuri, you hungry?" I asked.  "We got eggs, toast, sausage—"

            He wasn't even looking at me.  He only gripped his hands tighter; I noticed that one of his hands had criss-crosses of red skin, the tell-tales of a recent healing.  It looked like half of his hand must have gotten ripped off.

            Yuri sat down on the floor, on his make-shift bed.  "I'm going to the Graveyard."

            "You haven't got any Malice," Halley reminded him quietly.  Yuri ignored him and went to sleep.  Halley only shook his head and began to heal his injuries.

            "Okay, what happened?"

            "Alice is in the Graveyard," Zhuzhen said.  He had already finished healing himself; one Nourishing Potion had done the trick.

            "Yuri's Graveyard?" Keith asked for clarification.  "But why?"

            "Is she protecting him like his father did?" I guessed.  It seemed like something Alice would do.

            "No."  Halley sat with his legs crossed and his head cradled in his hands.  "Yuri says the masks are trapping her.  The only way he can get in is with some malice, but he can't get any more."  The teenager drew in a rough breath.  "He went insane."

            I tried to process all this.  Alice was in the Graveyard, not of her own volition, but because the masks had trapped her.  Yuri could sense her somehow but had no way of reaching her.  I could definitely see Yuri snapping.  "How bad was it?"

            "See his hand?"  Halley pointed to it, the ragged lines and reddened patches.  "That was him.  He broke his talisman too.  Then he just broke down."

            "Yuri cried?" I said incredulously.  With how stony and indifferent he'd been before, I thought he couldn't cry.  But it seemed like the last few hours had taken him right up to the emotional edge he'd been sneaking to and flung him straight off.

            "Al-Alice," Yuri breathed.  "Alice."

            His hands reached out in front of him, stopping in midair.

            "Open up!  Open the door!  Alice!"  His hands were pounding on what must have been the door in his Graveyard.  "Alice!  Alice!"  His voice broke as he begged, "Please…"

            "He's not making any sort of progress," I said.  "And I don't know about you guys, but I don't want to listen to a futile struggle."

            It was clear from Halley's and Zhuzhen's expressions that they weren't too keen on that idea either.  Keith shook Yuri until he woke up.

            "If you do not have Malice, it is useless to try, isn't it?" Keith asked him.  "Why don't you tell us what is happening?  We might be able to think of something.  You could ask Roger Bacon too."

            "And put something in your stomach," I said.  "You look like a ghost, kiddo."  I speared a thick sausage and waved it enticingly in his direction.  "Interested?"

            "I'm not hungry," he said.

            I shrugged, although I was disappointed with his refusal.  He'd been eating a lot less than usual, which was really a shame because if he lost any weight, it'd be muscle.

            "Humor me kiddo.  Just have a little," I said, making a plate with two sausages, a piece of toast, and some eggs.  Pathetically small by Yuri standards, but it was a start.  "You really do look like you could use some food," I told him.  His face was pale, though I wasn't sure why.  Yuri took the plate and I congratulated myself on the small achievement.  "So tell us what's going on."

            "When I was fused with the Seraphic Radiance for the first time, I tried to kill myself.  I was digging my own grave.  But Alice came in and saved me."

            "Right, we knew this," I said.  Well, everyone except Halley maybe, but the psychic was following along just fine.

            "I didn't know Alice had traded her soul to save mine."

            My eyebrows rose at this.  It was news to me.  No wonder kiddo had been tearing himself up.

            "And that's why she died," Zhuzhen said.

            Yuri's fists clenched, threatening to tear the patchwork hand back open.  "Yeah.  And now the masks have her soul and they're keeping her in the temple.  Past the doors that separate the living from the dead."

            "So you need Malice," Halley said.

            "But I couldn't get any in the ruins."  Yuri stared at one of the sausages before popping it in his mouth.  He had gotten paler just talking about it.  I doubted I wanted to know what exactly was going on in his mind.

            "Wait."  Halley was frowning.  "If you guys are separated, how'd Alice cut you before?"  Confused, I looked at both of them, wondering what Halley was talking about.

            "Before she was in a different part of the Graveyard.  The Masks were hurting her then too, but whenever I came they were gone."

            "Whenever you came…at night?  So they let her go at night?"

            Yuri's eyes lit up as he breathed, "They do."

            "And Alice should know how you can help her.  So why don't you wait until nighttime and then go see her?"

            Zhuzhen agreed, "It's a good idea."

            The harmonixer looked down at the table, considering.  "Yeah.  But first I want to ask Roger Bacon."

            "He is still occupied in his experiment," Keith informed him.  With nothing to do but wait, Yuri ate his breakfast.  I was more than happy to reload his plate when it was empty, adding to the portions a sausage and two pancakes.  This was closer to a normal breakfast for Yuri, and good enough for his brunch.

            The basement door opened and a rush of purple smoke came out, along with a coughing alchemist.  "Hungry Rog?"

            He grumbled, his experiment having apparently failed.  He glanced around our table, at the mountains of food, and said, "I'll just have one or two pancakes."

            I grabbed a plate, stacked four pancakes on it, and topped them off with a small lake of syrup.  "Eat up Rog, you need a little fat.  Might smooth out those wrinkles a bit."  I grinned at the old mummy-man.

            Roger shook his head.  "I wonder why I bothered waking up sometimes."

            "Hey, I cooked it so you better eat it all," I told him.

            "You cook?" Yuri asked, one eyebrow raised in suspicion.  He poked his eggs dubiously.

            "Yes, I cook.  And you were fine with them before, so shut up and eat your eggs."

            "Yes ma'am," he muttered.

            "Excuse me?"

            "Ma'am.  You're older than me, I'll call you what you are," he said, stopping when I cocked my gun.

            "Sure you don't want to rethink that logic?"

            The Taoist of our party groaned, clapping a hand to his forehead.  "Could you not do this at the breakfast table?"

            "It's a brunch."

            "A what?"

            "Fine, fine," Yuri huffed relenting.  "Yes, miss."

            "Good," I said, putting the gun away.

            Yuri turned his attention to Roger Bacon.  "Hey Roger, I've got a question for ya."  He detailed what he knew of Alice's condition and situation, then asked the alchemist what he should do.  Surprisingly, Roger's answer was the same as Halley's: wait 'til night, ask Alice.  "Malice must be gathered by someone who loathes you.  Since the Masks have refused to do that, I don't know who would.  You're not getting in that door."

            "Why do they loathe you, anyway?" Halley asked.  "What'd you ever do to the Masks?"

            "Huh?"

            "…I trapped them," Yuri said.  "I was traveling with a priestess when we came to the village they were attacking.  They kept feeding off of the people's negative emotions and becoming stronger.  The only way left to deal with them was to seal them away."

            "And you sealed them away?" I said incredulously.  Yuri did not know any magic, so the idea seemed far-fetched.

            "No.  The priestess sealed them into my body.  That way they could only feed off of one person's emotions."

            I stared at him.  "So you just had to be the lucky one?"

            He shook his head.  "I was the only one who could be.  She said it had to be someone with a strong chi, and I was the one person other than her who was strong enough.  That's why they hate me so much.  I'm their cage."

            "Was it painful?" Halley asked.

            Zhuzhen nodded.  "I'm curious as well.  Demons are not often sealed away in that fashion.  Who was the priestess?"

            It was the wrong question.  Yuri's face turned dark.  "What does it matter?  She's probably dead now.  I hope she is."  He pushed his plate away and stood.  "I'm going."

            "Where?" I asked.

            He pulled on his trenchcoat.  "Out."

            I sighed and walked over to grab my own coat.  "Mind if I come with you?"

            He shrugged and started walking up the spiraling stairs.  "If you want."

**

**Author's Note:  **Really short, although all the chapters have been short so far.  I don't think there will ever be really long chapters in this ficcie.  Oh well…
    
    The story about the Masks is, once again, unrelated to all my other fanfics.  This one takes inspiration from one of the masks' lines, describing Yuri as 'The detestable young Harmonixer who damned us to eternal hell…'

You gotta wonder why, huh?

I don't know really too much about sealings and whatever though, but I kind of assumed you can put 'em in a person.  Unusual method, but if needed…^^?

Does anyone know any good Japanese girl names?  Need one for the priestess.

**

**Reviewers:**

**Greyfriars:**  ^^  Don't break your computer.  …or your foot.  ^^

**Naga:**  This was not what I would call a quick update, but at least you like it.  Yeah, Yuri's **trying** to do something now, although he might not be exactly succeeding.

**MikoNoNyte:**  He already regrets not having Malice.  Poor Yuri!

Yuri:    You're the one who does this stuff to me!


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